I just stepped in a big pile of sassy!

(after listening to “Sexy Back” by Justin Timberlake and questioning how excactly one “gets their sexy on”)

“I’ll open the door for you, because I’m getting my sexy on.”

Damn I love that kid.

Growing up, I was always amused by adults (and others) who didn’t get the meaning behind pop/hip hop song lyrics. For a kid from the sticks, I was pretty good at deciphering (dirty/hidden) meaning in a song lyric and/or making sense out of new words and phrases in pop music.

Nowadays - I think I’m losing my touch!
I heard “London Bridge,” by Fergie* (from The Black Eyed Peas) on the radio this morning - I was listening to the lyrics - and I just don’t get it!
I thought that looking them up online might help…
Well, actually, it’s the chorus that I just can’t decipher:
How come every time you come around
My London London Bridge want to go down
Like London London want you to go down
Like London London be going down

Excuse me?
Now, I shall try googling the meaning behind the song’s title….
I will also check out Urban Dictionary…
Nothing.
Anyone know what it means?

*The-Opposite-of-Awesome:
1) She humps a royal guard (ooh - London!) in the video. Nasty.
2) Many women like her, like, in a sexual way. I don’t get it! She looks so plastic! And evil! - It’s the eyebrows, among other things.

Prince’s wife just filed for divorce.
How do Jehovah’s Witnesses view divorce, anyway?
It’s his second, for the record.

Who wants to make bets that he chases after Carmen Electra a second time now that they’re both single!
Woo!
Too bad she’s afraid of his controlling ways.

Oh Prince, I love ya, but I can’t even imagine being married to you.

*Info from C.J. (shudder)
Have I mentioned how much it grates my nerves that she calls him “Symbolina?”
SO MUCH!

Lance Bass is gay?
Oh, honey - I had no idea! Hold on a mo ment…
I thought he was just a pioneer in the “metrosexual” movement.
Oh, my girlish dreams have been shattered - shattered!

Ann Curry does the Elaine dance from Seinfeld.
Seriously.
Too funny not to post.
See here for Ann and here for Elaine (fast forward to 1 minute, 45 seconds).

I used to think she was hot, too.
Sad, sad day.

On my goodness I am SO SURPRISED by the finale of American Idol.
Leave it to American t.v. viewers to be so UNPREDICTABLE.

hah.

Oh my god, though.
Can we talk about Clay Aiken, his gay impersonator, and Clay’s NEW HAIR?
(above was a video of his performance/”duet” click here to see a jpg of Clay’s new hairdo)
Jesus Mary and Joseph he looked like a lesbian!
Or Haley Joel Osment with a dash of Keanu Reeves and a hint of kd lang!
What insanity.
You know the scary thing?
It was kind of hot!

And, on the real, Prince IS the hottest thing on two legs.
I can read his mind.
“Oh, I’ll be on your stupid two-bit show, but listen here -
1) I will not perform with any of the idols.
2) Ryan Seacrest or anyone else affiliated with the show may not touch me at any time.
3) Pay me, bitches. Pay me in DIAMONDS AND PEARLS!
4) I best be the star of the show, ooh! You know that’s right!
5) I said no touching!”

I love Prince.

You know, I have to say I don’t think Chris was smug, full-of-himself, or boring.
That’s all I’m reading around the blogosphere today.

I thought he was fantastic, touching, talented, a stellar performer, and (naturally) gorgeous.
He’s like every guy I ever had a HUGE crush on in high school, except he’s not a jerk!
Y’all are just jealous.
Maybe if he had flashed his undies at the crowd he’d still be in the competition.

Honestly, if Taylor wins, it will be a sad day for American Idol.

So sorry none of you were around to see Joe Cocker and the like (damn kids), but that’s all he is - a cheap imitation and a bad dancer.
“Ooh. Feel sorry for him. He has gray hair.”
Notsomuch. I’m over it.

Elliott, you better win this thing!

Oh boy.
American Idol was a trip tonight.
In short,
*Katie McPhee let me down.
*I fell in love with Elliott.
*Chris was smokin’ as usual (and gets a gold star for the “boxer briefs” comment).
P.S. Seacrest, what in the hell is a “hybrid?” It’s not another word for boxer briefs. It’s a type of car that runs on electricity and fuel.
All that botox is messing with his brain.
*Taylor - oh, Taylor. I try to like you, I really do.
But I don’t.

SOUL PATROL?
Stop!

And, Britney Spears is pregnant again.
Yawn, yawn.
“Oops I did it again…
I slept with K-Fed.”
Gag.

I do, I love her.
Tonight, for my birthday (which was last Sunday), Stacia took me to her show at the *beautiful* Pantages theatre here in good old Minneapolis.
Loved every minute of it.
Even Stacia, who’s not nearly as big of a Kathy fan as I am loved the show.

Gay-tastic!

I’m jealous, too, because she gave a shout out to a “Jason” who posts on her message boards - that could have been me - that is - if I had started reading her message boards prior to this morning, which I hadn’t.

I wonder if the evil local gossip maven (I mentioned her a few posts ago, and care not to link and give her more traffic) was there. Maybe she could see what a real, good, intelligent gossip hound can do. Because, damn, CJ’s just not funny (or smart or energetic, or engaging… the list goes on).

Oh, Kathy Griffin - how I love you!
(and your jokes about fisting, Star Jones, Celine Dion, Big Gay Al (Reynolds), and the like)
Hi-larious!

“Al Reynolds is so gay that when he walks by, you actually hear snapping!”

Hey - she’s coming back to Minneapolis on June 22nd - who wants to go with me?

Taylor Hicks = Pure Comedy.
Thank goodness for weekend update.
Joe Cocker disease!
WHOO!

Update - Found the video.
In case you missed it, you can check it out yourself here.
Enjoy!